Patience Oti's Blog

There is always more to what we will BECOME—the dreams in our hearts, the pain in our chests. The highs and lows. The fleeting thoughts. The disappointing and embarrassing moments. The truths we told. The parts of us that stayed hidden. The stories we shared, the ones we are proud of, and the ones we left untold. The families that shaped us—our hopes, challenges, and desperations. Our nationalities, race, and identities. The clear paths and the undefined. The special moments. The grey days and the ones spent lingering in bed. The days we couldn’t see ourselves for what we could be. The defeating, deafening silence from those we once called friends. The lies we told ourselves about who we really are. The starting over days. The years we lost. The feigned laughter, the genuine one, the fights and quarrels with self and society. The hate, envy, and pretense from others. The ones that kept us going and the ones that brought us down. The moments that hit us where it truly matters. The love,...

 BE INTENTional There is nothing absolutely wrong in  focusing on what works for you at the moment in spite of a problem in your life. Problems are wired into the world and it can be a connector to a possible future, range of emotions and possibilities you may never imagined lies within you. If your marriage is not working at the moment and your "Happy ever after" seem to be an awry of tumultuous adventure doesn't mean your life should be "suspended" or focused on that problem. While you're negotiating a possible balance with your spouse you must not leave other areas of your life unattended.  You must excel at what your true essence is, all that you were made for before you ever said "I do" Once, I was scheduled for an event when my sister suddenly passed away. It was such a cold moment being thrown into an unexpected pool of grief. At this moment I had to take on the advice of an elderly couple way back in college who once told me that though we...

 THE MIRACLE OF THE BETRAYED It is  easy to give up and give out when we have waited  so long for something or a need to be filled. It's much easier for others, to look down, despise, be repulsive of your presence and everything or anything that represents you. The audacity at which they quickly label you as lazy, visionless and one that lacks direction is outstanding.  Or, they see you as having a "spiritual problem" in the natural African  coinage. We know that people often experience grey and grave moments in their lives. Much of which is no fault of the bearer or the physically handicapped or the spiritually detained individuals.  Know, that not all things are logically and spiritually  explained. So long as earth and people exist, there will always be grey areas. There will be " almost had it all". As, well as * I came from  a long list of successful individuals, which made me automatically self- sufficient and the journey to success much eas...

This is one month of the year where expectations are high, anxiety and frustration bloom for many. It is that time when you begin to question whether it will be or not. My very nice friend and colleague once shared with me, that in life, people will always have expectations- you also have expectations. – When will you marry? Married- when are you having children? – Child comes. When are you having another child… and it keeps coming. It is life, don’t get mad, many of them mean well but shirk mockers. It is often a great challenge and sometimes a shaming experience when you don’t have what you should at a time or the things that comes naturally to others is often a jungle toggle for you. Meanwhile, at some point you will be disrespected by those who once respected you especially if they are more privileged than you in acquiring these life assets. They begin to address you in terms of their experience gained where you are lagging. Handle it well. Wow! It is a tough place to b...

The sun smiled with all its strength oblivious of the worries of tomorrow. The rain wet the earth until the earth knew what it meant to have a thorough bath. Jake cried out of his mother's womb into a world of uncertainty, unpredictable outcome of happiness, joy, sorrow and laughter oblivious of the end of the beginning. Betty had her first long kiss with Benny, welcoming the fears and joys of matrimony. Patty made a first class degree in the university, happy to make a transit into the larger world; where common sense and graces rule not degree. Today is Patrick's ordination as the Bishop of World Class Christian Assembly; the DEVIL isn't smiling so GOD deployed His angels.   Today, my friend told me about 'They' , in his words ‘they say I'm doing fine' . When I asked, who are they ? He said ' they' are Angels of Consolation. One believes in the goodness of the present another in the goodness of both the present and the future and both w...

THE ART OF WAITING “For a while" is a phrase whose length can't be measured. At least by the person who's waiting.” ― Haruki Murakami.   I have started to realise that waiting is an art, that waiting achieves things.   Waiting can be very difficult but very powerful. Time is a valuable thing. If you can wait, you can sometimes achieve something that you could not achieve today. However hard you have worked; how much money you threw up in the air, how many times you banged your head against the wall- If there is a need to wait, then you must do it profitably.   The people who are most successful at living and loving are those who can learn to wait successfully. Not many people enjoy waiting or learning patience. Yet, waiting can be a powerful tool that will help us accomplish much good.   “Waiting hurts. Forgetting hurts. But not knowing which decision to take can sometimes be the most painful...” ― José N. Harris. We cannot always have what we w...